A guy walks into a local pharmacy and walks up to the counter where a lady pharmacist is filling prescriptions. When she finally gets around to helping him he says, "I'd like 99 condoms please". With a surprised look on her face the pharmacist says, "99 Condoms!?! Fuck me!" The guy replies, "Make it 100 then..."
Q:Why don't girls like to date basketball players? A: You never know if they're going to dribble or shoot
If you have 2 balls between your legs, then you are a man. But if you have 4 balls between your legs, don't think you are Super man; there's someone fucking you
Q: What do toys and tits have in common? A: They're both originally made for kids, but dads end up playing with them
Q: What do u call the organ of old men ? A: Floppy dicks
A woman walks up to a guy in a blue bathing suit and says, "Did you know your eyes match your swim trunks?" He says, "Why? Are my eyes bulging?"
A waiter brings a lady her vegetable soup, and his thumb is hooked over the cup. She says, "Waiter, your thumb is in my soup." He says, "Yeah. I got arthritis and the heat makes it feel better." She says, "Well, why don't you stick it up your ass?" He says, "I do that in the kitchen."
According to research, the life of a smoker decreases by 5 minutes everytime he burns a cigarette. And every fuck increases man's life by 8 minutes. That implies that fucking smokers live forever
Three guys introduced to a girl. Hi, I am Peter-not a Saint. Second: I am Paul-not a Pope. Third: I am John- not a Baptist. The girl retorts back. Nice to see you all. I am Mary-not a Virgin
A woman goes to her doctor, complaining that her husband is 300% impotent. The doctor says, "I'm not sure I understand what you mean." She says, "Well, the first 100% you can imagine. In addition, he burned his tongue and broke his finger!"
Santa and his wife, Jeeto are watching boxing on TV. Santa sighs and says, " I'm disappointed! It was all over in 2 minutes!" Jeeto retorts, "Good! Now you know how I feel!"
Q: What's the difference between a turtle on its back and a blonde on her's? A: Nothing. They're both screwed
A woman sat down on a park bench, glanced around and decided to stretch out her legs on the seat and relax. After a while a beggar came up to her and said, "Hello luv, how's about us going for a walk together." "How dare you," said the woman, "I'm not one of your cheap pickups!" "Well then," said the beggar, "What are you doing in my bed?"
Mum: did'nt I tell you that if a guy touches your boobd say, dont & if he touches ur pussy, say stop! Jill: but mum he touched both, so I said don't stop.
There's a scream from the bedroom. Santa runs in and there's a guy leaping out of the window. His wife, Jeeto, says, "Whaa! That guy just fucked me twice!" Santa says, "Twice? Why didn't you call me in after he fucked you once?" Jeeto says, "Because I thought it was you...until he started for the second one."
Q: Did you hear about the gay bank robber? A: He tied up the safe and blew the guard.
Woman participating in a survey was asked how she felt about condoms. She said, ?
Depends on what?s in it for me.?
Question: What is the difference between "hard" and "light"? Answer: You can get to sleep with a light on.
Q: Did you hear about the two gay judges ? A: They tried each other
What is similarity betweeen walking on the edge of Mount Everest and getting blow job from an 85-yr old woman? Whatever you do dont look down